Jokes, Told and Retold

Stories, like poetry and art often give us direction and reinforce who we are. Several stories that I use to like to tell are as follows:

A mother had two twin boys. One boy was always optimistic about everything in life. The other boy was always pessimistic. “I don’t like this” or “This is not as good as my brother’s” type of kid. Their mother exhausted her reservoir of ideas and finally went to the doctor with the two boys. She explained the problem and told the doctor that she wanted the little optimist to be a little more realistic and the pessimist to be more positive about things in general. “I have a suggestion,” said the doctor. “Christmas is coming soon. Give the little pessimist the best of toys. Give the optimist a pile of horse manure.” On Christmas morning the mother looked into the room of the pessimist. “This toy is the wrong color. My bike is not as good as my friends.” On and on he went. A disappointed mother bowed her head and silently said “This experiment hasn’t worked with the pessimist.” She then looked into the room of the little optimist. In the middle of the room was a pile of horse manure. With a shovel in his hand the boy kept saying, “with all this manure there must be a pony somewhere.”

One of my favorite good news/bad news stories tells about two friends who loved to play baseball. They were both pitchers. They ate, slept and played the sport every day. On one occasion John and Jim were talking about baseball and the question arose whether or not there was any baseball in Heaven? They reached an agreement that whoever dies first would come back to earth and tell their friend whether there was any baseball in Heaven. John died first and Jim anxiously waited John’s return to learn about baseball in Heaven. Weeks and months went by without any word from John. Finally, after about a year, John appeared to Jim. “Tell me” said Jim, “is there baseball in Heaven?” John, after a moment of silence, stated, “Jim, I have good news and bad news to share with you. The good news is that there are lots and lots of baseball games in Heaven. The bad news is that come Friday you are going to be the starting pitcher.”